Captain Digital

Random musings on politics, society, and pop culture from the Internet's marketing curmudgeon.

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Entertainment

SEX. (Now that I have your attention…)

slut-puppy-BarbieI had to go on a casting call for a client a week or so ago. We were casting for a female role in an online tutorial. Through a mis-communication with the talent agency, instead of 30- and 40-year-old women showing up for the call, we saw teenagers and 20-year-olds. Now understand, I’m a 40-something-year-old (very) married male. We saw model after model show up that looked as if they were in their 20’s. When I asked about their age and experience (auditions are possibly the only profession where you can legitimately ask a woman her age without violating a social taboo), I heard things like “Oh, I’m 17 years old, and I’ve been modeling for…oh…two months.”

Pause with me for a nanosecond.

[Read more…] about SEX. (Now that I have your attention…)

Directorial Excess.

King Long.I watched a lot of movies over the holidays. I’m a movie fan. At one time, I’d watch almost anything, just to try and learn something about telling a story visually. I’d even watch a bad movie, just to see how truly bad it could get. (For the record, the worst movie I ever voluntarily sat through on my own dime was Gas, a little comedy opus on the gas crisis of the 70’s. I don’t think Donald Sutherland put THAT one on his resume.)

But, I digress. As I’ve studied editing, lighting, directing, screenwriting, scoring and so forth, I’ve been struck by how some movies can go so very wrong. I’m also struck by the fact that good directors are allowed to bend the rules of storytelling, because of studio indulgence – and how bad directors keep getting hired to helm movies they have no business directing. [Read more…] about Directorial Excess.

Your Right to Stop Annoying Me.

Tired.Do you have a favorite magazine? TV show? Online site? Forget, for a moment, political speech media – news shows, political blogs, partisan sites, and such. Let’s just talk about “Mainstream Media (MSM)” I’m talking about special-interest magazines, network television, Top-40 radio, et cetera. Have you noticed lately that they seem to be getting more and more politically opinionated? I have. Everything from Law & Order to Wired magazine seems to have veered from “entertainment” to “screed” in an alarmingly short period of time. And another thing – I’ve noticed that the vast majority of these media outlets espouse a doctrine that is far to the left of the political spectrum.

The other night I watched an episode of Law & Order. It featured a right-wing, conservative radio talk show host/author getting gunned down outside a Manhattan bookstore in the first five minutes of the show. Did I mention the victim was being sued by an employee for sexual harassment? (I wonder if Bill O’Reilly would call this “hate speech.”) [Read more…] about Your Right to Stop Annoying Me.

Yelling “Movie!” in a crowed firehouse.

How Weird, Stern.In January 2006, The “King of All Media” (a.k.a. Howard Stern) moves his blue humor act from terrestrial radio to Sirius satellite radio.

Yawn.

I don’t know about you, but I’m not going to hold my breath that Sirius is going to see some huge uptick in sales, as Stern-iacs sign up for satelite radio to get their daily fix. (A) I don’t care, and (B) I know something Sirius doesn’t.

Consider parents with a youngster who suddenly discovers that he can get a rise out of his parents when he uses a “bad” word. What happens? Well, in my family, the child is told “we don’t approve of that kind of language.” If the language persists, the punishment begins. Eventually (even in families that equate a lack of discipline with “loving” the child) the novelty of the bad word wears off. Eventually, the child must either give up, or look for an even more shocking word. Eventually, even that falls flat, and the child has nothing left to do for an encore.

Pause with me for a nanosecond.

[Read more…] about Yelling “Movie!” in a crowed firehouse.

Avoiding the Obvious.

3000 lb. gorilla
What happens when your worldview clashes with reality? For most people, it seems they will go to almost any length to ignore the obvious.

Case in point, Sony. They maintain that there’s nothing wrong with their DRM software – people just misunderstand it. Uh huh. As if we all fail to grasp that Sony is using their goal to prevent (mis)use of their copyrighted IP and just happen to endanger every computer by installing a back door for hackers. They think they are justified in doing whatever it takes to protect their property – even putting customer’s property (their PCs) at risk. When confronted by the folly of their actions, they first ignore, then spin it, then back down but refuse to acknowledge the obvious – they were wrong. [Read more…] about Avoiding the Obvious.

The Five Nines.

phone
Back when you could get any kind of phone you liked, as long as it was connected to a wall and was provided by Ma Bell, phone service was simple. It just always worked. The industry calls it “the 5 nines,” meaning your POTS (Plain Old Phone System) line is expected to work 99.999% of the time. Through power outages. Through storms. Through just about anything. And if it DID go down, you could be sure that it would be working again ASAP. Those boys didn’t fool around. [Read more…] about The Five Nines.

Who is Captain Digital?

What is this all about? Simple. I’m a marketing guy/graphic designer/copywriter/animator/whatever. As you might expect with all those “/” in my vocations, I have a lot of opinions on a lot of things. Mostly marketing and advertising, but we may wander ocasionally. Check back here for random thoughts on the state of marketing, advertising, politics, pop culture, and (un)common sense.