Captain Digital

Random musings on politics, society, and pop culture from the Internet's marketing curmudgeon.

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Pretzel Logic (with apologies to Steely Dan)

If a tree falls in the forest, and no one is around to watch, does it still make a sound? Of course it does. To think otherwise is silly.

If a man commits a crime and no one catches him, is it still a crime? No doubt.

But what if a politician or bureaucrat (or several of them) commit a crime, break the law, or violate the Constitution and the news media suppresses the story, and does not report on it…is it still newsworthy? I’d say undeniably “YES.” But that’s abstract. The reality is a bit more complicated. [Read more…] about Pretzel Logic (with apologies to Steely Dan)

Realigning Priorities on Memorial Day

With a late father who served proudly during WWII, and an (ex)stepson who’s an active duty Marine, I’m aware of what kinds of sacrifices men and women make, to serve our country in the military. Apparently, it’s easy for many Americans to forget just how important that service is, and exactly WHAT these brave men and women are fighting for. Let me make this very simple. They fight for our rights. Our right to disagree with our government. Our right to speak out about what we think. Our right to worship as we please – or not worship at all, if we so choose.Recently, a WWII veteran in Virginia made the national news, as he was threatened with legal action for erecting a 21-foot flagpole in front of his Virginia home, to fly an American flag. After his case received national attention, the pinheads with his homeowners association backed-down. They could have saved themselves a lot of trouble, had they simply done a little research into who this man was, and what he’d done in WWII. He passed away last month. I’m sure the homeowners association will waste no time in getting his flagpole removed. Which is a shame, for it should remain standing as a reminder of a great American and his sacrifice. Today I received an email from a friend, that detailed his story. I’d like to share it with you, here. [Read more…] about Realigning Priorities on Memorial Day

Are Progressives Schizophrenic?

I’m at an age where I value consistency. I view it as the opposite of hypocrisy. Now keep in mind, hypocrisy is an Equal Opportunity Destroyer – it strikes both Liberal and Conservative alike, with an equanimity only dreamt of by the EEOC. For every political scandal on the Left, I can cite you chapter and verse of one on the Right. But there’s one huge difference between the Left and the Right, when dealing with hypocrisy. Those on the Right tend to vilify those on the Left AND the Right, when they are caught, red-handed. Those on the Left seem to excuse the behavior of those on Team Lefty, while excoriating those on the Right. This requires some fairly impressive mental gymnastics on their part, with some contortions that would put Nadia Comaneci in traction. To wit… [Read more…] about Are Progressives Schizophrenic?

We’re From the Government…and We’re Here to Help.

Those have GOT to be the nine scariest words in the English language. I don’t know about you, but the less the government helps me, the happier I am. Why? because all that “free help” is never free. There’s a huge difference between “freedom” and “free.” With “Freedom,” I’m free to succeed – or fail. I’m free to decide what’s best for me. And I’m free to make smart choices or dumb ones. But the government is about to change all that. Welcome to the world Aldous Huxley envisioned in 1984 – only just shy of 30 years late.  [Read more…] about We’re From the Government…and We’re Here to Help.

There’s humor in all things. (Unless you’re a Liberal.)

So I’m innocently blogging along over on Facebook (http://facebook.com/captaindigital and http://facebook.com/captaindigitalspeaks) when I happen to post a funny story I heard from a fellow Conservative. Six or so friends of generally right-leaning viewpoints thought it was a howl. But one, ultra-left wing person of my acquaintance unloaded on me like a B-17 Flying Fortress over Dresden – with about as much tact. He resorted to the typical Liberal tactics (name-calling, Judas-goats, hyperbole, and other assorted nonsense) and ranted about how Conservatives are all wingnuts and idiots. (Somebody get this guy a mirror. Please.) But it occurred to me that there’s a fundamental inequality here – Conservatives can find the humor in a Jon Stewart or Stephen Colbert (most of the time), even when they poke fun at Conservatives. But Liberals seem uniformly incapable of reciprocity. Why is that?  [Read more…] about There’s humor in all things. (Unless you’re a Liberal.)

Is motherhood a “real job”?

After the dust-up from the Sunday, talking-heads news shows about Ann Romney, where Obamanista Hillary Rosen declared that Ann Romney was unfit to comment as a spokesperson for American women because “she never had a real job,” it would seem that the Right and the Left are falling into two camps: those that think that Motherhood IS a real job, and worthy of the same “real” status as any other, and those that feel as though you can’t be “fulfilled” or a “real woman” unless you have a day job in addition to raising kids. And Rosen’s statement seems to have lit a fuse on a powder keg. So that leaves the question hanging out there – is motherhood a real job?  [Read more…] about Is motherhood a “real job”?

The Country Gets Lei’d for Christmas

The President of the United States is more than just the head of the Executive Branch, the Commander-in-Chief, and the most powerful individual in the world. He’s also a figurehead – someone who is supposed to lead by example. Presidents are usually mindful of appearances, and of the needs of their staff. For instance most Presidents have traditionally either spent the Christmas Holidays at the White House or at Camp David. They do this because, while a President can pretty much do whatever they want (at the taxpayer expense), they are mindful of appearances. The idea of a President not jet-setting off to some exotic, expensive locale for the Christmas holidays somehow makes them seem more human, more “of the people.” So with that in mind, let’s take a look at recent Presidents and where they’ve spent their holidays: [Read more…] about The Country Gets Lei’d for Christmas

Power Grab.

Back before alcohol ads were regulated to death by the federal government, one beer maker, Schlitz, used the tag line “You only go around once in life, so you’ve got to grab for all the gusto you can get.” The message was clear: you get one shot at things, so don’t waste time with half-measures – don’t ask permission, at worst, beg forgiveness. Evidently, The Chosen One has taken these words to heart in more ways than one, and has decided to implement this slogan as his modus operandi for the rest of his term in office. Hence, his comments yesterday regarding the Supreme Court. [Read more…] about Power Grab.

How well do YOU know the Constitution?

The Constitution is much in the news lately. And with good reason. It is – or it’s supposed to be – the supreme law of the land. You can’t get more basic around here than the rights guaranteed in the U.S. Constitution. But from laws in Chicago, NYC and D.C. that attempt to abridge our rights to self-defense, to the Congressional overreach that is the “Individual Mandate” of ObamaCare, the Constitution is under attack. From where I sit, there’s a vast majority of Americans that don’t have a clue as to what’s actually IN the Constitution. That’s bad, because you can’t appreciate what you’ve got there – or why it’s so precious to preserve – if you don’t know what’s in it. Hillsdale College is the only 4-year institution of higher learning in the country that takes NO money from the Federal government, and is therefore able to teach without interference from Uncle Sam. They require ALL incoming Freshmen to take a course on the Constitution as a prerequisite for attending the school. They are currently offering a FREE course on the Constitution to the general public. I’m gonna take it, because I believe you can never know too much about our laws. But if you’re not convinced you need to know more about our Constitution yourself, here’s a little quiz they offer to test your knowledge.

Arguing with Progressives.

I have to confess. I’ve broken one of my Lenten vows. I promised to give up Liberals for Lent. Forgive me, Lord for I have backslid. Tonight, I got into a protracted argument about ObamaCare. It started innocently enough. I made some of what I thought would be helpful suggestions as to where we might move on from here (see my previous post on ObamaCare). It was, apparently, like waving a red flag in front of an entire herd of angry bulls. I use that analogy advisedly, for they had the ability to comprehend points of law analogous to bovines, they were full of the same kind of by-product found in pastures where bulls frolic, and their command of the English language was peppered with invectives that are reminiscent of words beginning with the prefix “bull_.” I got to thinking about how best to deal with them, and I realized it was a fool’s errand. A battle of wits with unarmed combatants. Now normally, that can amuse. Granted, there’s not much more sport in it than you’d find in shooting unarmed ducks in a rather small barrel. Still. But this group was collectively so hidebound by dogma, so blinded to reason, and so damnably dense that it took all the joy out of it. They did not know they’d been beaten.  Nay, in fact, they reveled in their defeat, braying (or mooing, I suppose) as if they’d won some great victory. Their decisive blow? They descended to name-calling. What a victory! But this got me to thinking back to my salad days, when I first became acquainted with the works of one of America’s greatest authors, Samuel Langhorne Clemens, better known by his nom de plume, Mark Twain. And it occurred to me that Mr. Twain could explain my situation far better than I. So without his permission (him being long in the grave and all that) and his works thankfully being in the public domain, I present, for your enjoyment, a chapter from A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court, wherein our hero, Sir Boss, narrates a tale, a chance encounter with an English subject as he tries to explain the concept of relative worth. (After all, if you’re gonna have a guest writer, why not the best, eh?) [Read more…] about Arguing with Progressives.