By now, you’ve probably heard about an internal Powerpoint stack that was leaked to the public, put together by the diversity department at Coca-Cola, and how they were trying to train employees to be “less white.” You might not have seen the original story, but you couldn’t miss all the memes flying about the ‘net, mocking Coke and their misbegotten messaging. (My particular fave are the ones that show Coke firing the polar bears, and hiring brown and black bears instead, because the polar bears are…wait for it…too white.)
Yes. Wokeness has gotten that stupid.
In order to understand what the braintrust (?) at the World’s Largest Soft Drink Company™ is doing, you must first accept the Leftist argument classified as “Critical Race Theory.” This viewpoint holds that:
- All whites are inherently racist
- Being white precludes you from seeing that you are racist
- Whites have created a world where systemic racism is pervasive
- Whites are ill-equipped to fix this – they can only atone, but it will never be enough
This is what you might call a closed-loop system. Or circular logic. “A is true because B, and B is true because A.” Or to put it another way, “You can’t win…you can’t break even…and you can’t quit the game.”
I don’t for a second believe that America is systemically racist. (But, according to their “logic,” I’m a white guy, so whadda I know?) But I don’t believe we’re a racist nation because I see all sorts of signs around me that we are not, and are in fact, the most diverse, compassionate and fair nation on the face of the earth. I was a child of the ’60s. I grew up in a time where there were still separate water fountains labeled “Black” and “White.” A world where blacks were treated as second-class citizens, forced to sit in the back of the bus, or worse, not allowed on the bus at all. If you’d asked me if America was a racist country in 1968, I’d have said, “Yes. We are.” Fast forward to 2021, and we’ve had a black (okay…mixed race) President. We have a mixed race Vice President now, who self-identifies as “black.” We have black Justices, black Senators, black Representatives, blacks, Latinos and Asians serving in every level of the Federal government. We have blacks in large, near disproportionately large numbers on TV, in dramas and comedies – comedies where blacks are largely portrayed as cool, smart, witty and wise, and whites are largely goofy doofuses, who will never be as hip as their black friends. Advertising is another area where there IS no color barrier. For decades, we’ve watched commercials that feature mixed-race relationships. Imagine how well any company would fare in the 1960s, if their spots featured a black man and a white woman. There’d likely be lynch mobs at the company headquarters.
On a point closer to home, I have two (and soon three) sons-in-law. Two are black men (happily) married to white women. The son-in-law to be has a Latino heritage. All this would have been unthinkable 30 years ago. If that isn’t progress in race relations, I don’t know what is.
But the Left doesn’t want us to live in peace and racial harmony. You see “progress” they see “racism.” You say “colorblind” and they cry “Racist!” and “Bigot!” You point to signs we have come a long way, and they scream that you are incapable of seeing systemic racism.
I’m here to tell you that most big companies are cowards. They do what they think is politically expedient to do, in order to curry favor with those that scream the loudest. So the woke mob found that their rioting and looting in Portland and other large cities didn’t play well in Peoria. But that did not deter them one itty-bitty-bit. Not in the slightest. No, their game plan is to shake your faith in your own senses. If they can convince you that you have no way of knowing if you’re a racist, then then it’s just a hop, skip and rhetorical jump to getting you to believe that you are, and that racism is so widespread that you wouldn’t have a clue that it surrounds you. “Racism? Why…you’re soaking in it!” You’re not. But you are being soaked. So are the idiots running Coke. Instead of standing up to the woke mob, and saying “We’re not racists, and we don’t care what you say,” they’ve acquiesced, and added Woke Training to their corporate curriculum. It’s the cause that depresses, for there is no cure for systemic racism. It’s like trying to tell a grade-schooler that you can cure “cooties.” You have ’em until the cool kids say you don’t.
So I’ve voted with my wallet. As much as I love Coca-Cola, I won’t be buying any more until they renounce their stupid War on White People. I may not know how to be less white, but I damn sure know how to drink less Coke. There are products out there that I hope and pray don’t get woke, because they would represent a major problem for me to get them out of my life. Coke is not on the “too big to bail” list. This time of year, I usually give up something for Lent. I joke that I give up Cokes (to lose weight) and Liberals (to lower my blood pressure). Looks like I’ll be able to deal with Liberals again after Easter, but I doubt I’ll be buying any more Coke products that soon, if ever.
I am white. I can’t change that (nor would I) any more than I can change my sex from male to female. (All those who insist that Transgenders really can switch sexes, I’ll deal with you lot later.) There’s nothing wrong with being white, black, brown, or whatever color you feel you need to assign a race. And there’s nothing to be ashamed of, either. It’s time we push back on this bunch of over-privileged, poorly-educated idiots who struggle to out-virtue signal each other. I’m done. And don’t bother telling me I’m too “white” to get it. I now self-identify as “beige.”