All posts by captaindigital

Independence.

It’s Independence Day. Coincidentally, that’s my favorite holiday, both because I’ve always been a fan of patriotism, and because it’s so close to my own birthday. But I’d argue that Independence Day is the most important non-religious holiday on the American calendar. And unfortunately, it’s the one that is the most at-risk from those who would like to either abolish it, or turn it into something meaningless. Allow me to explain… Continue reading Independence.

President Mulligan

I’m not a huge golf fan. It’s genetic. My father, my grandfather, my great-uncle, and many other forbearers were obsessed with the game. And they were all equally-genetically ill-suited for it. My great uncle Tony was a good example. On one particular day at the 18th hole, he knocked one into the water trap. He was so angry about it, he marched down to the water and threw his entire bag of expensive clubs in the drink, then stormed into the clubhouse for some liquid refreshment. His young caddy took off their shoes, socks, and rolled up their knickers, then waded in and fished out the bag and all the clubs. He then dried them off, and brought them into the clubhouse, no doubt expecting a big tip. What I’m sure he didn’t expect was that Tony grabbed the clubs under one arm, the caddy under the other, and then marched down to the water trap, where he threw them both in. Genetically. Ill-suited. So I stay off the links. Continue reading President Mulligan

If I Had a Hammer…

No. I’m NOT making this up.

Not content to have banned private ownership of most guns (and making the ones you can still legally own bloody difficult to do so), the home of the Magna Carta, bangers n’ mash, and the London bobbie have begun the inexorable slide into a state of irrelevancy by promoting a campaign to ban knifes.

I’m not kidding.  Continue reading If I Had a Hammer…

What’s in a Word?

#!@‽¶≠!!

Words. We writers live by ’em. And sometimes (if you offend the wrong Muslim lunatic) die by them. But they are the essential part of how we do what we do. Words mean things. But not all words mean the same things to all people. And living in the Age of Political Correctness, not all wordsmiths are created equal, at least as far as permission to use certain words goes. Allow me to give you some examples… Continue reading What’s in a Word?

Ranking Race.

Photo credit: CNN

I grew up in the South, in the 1960s. It was a time of racial unrest. I remember seeing posters around Shreveport, advertising a concert planned by James Brown – the hardest working man in show business. What a lot of people don’t know about Brown is that he also helped to defuse the ticking time bomb of racial unrest, rather than work to exploit racial tensions, as so many self-styled ‘leaders’ do today.

Fast-forward to 2015. Two incidents in the news make me think that racism is still a huge problem in the USA, but not for the reasons – and the people – that you’d think. I’m afraid that this time around, it’s not Conservatives that have a problem with race. It’s Liberals. And there’s a litmus test that determines just how “black” or how “brown” you are, and it’s got nothing to do with a color swatch book. Let me explain… Continue reading Ranking Race.

Yes, Virginia…it CAN happen here…

I’ve been getting a lot of questions, messages, and comments about the incident that happened this weekend in McKinney (where I live), about a video posted to the ‘net, showing three McKinney PD officers detaining and arresting some kids at a pool party. If you watched the video, (shot on a cell phone by a bystander) you see very angry cops, one of whom pulls his gun (and then re-holsters it, when the other two officers flank him), and a young girl grabbed by her pigtails and forced to the ground, face in the grass and handcuffed. Pretty shocking stuff. So what really happened? And is this as bad a situation as it looks on the video?

Let’s everybody take a step back, and then take a deep breath. Continue reading Yes, Virginia…it CAN happen here…

Transitory State

Bruce-Jenner-Vanity-Fair-cover

When I was a kid, life was simple. There were boys. There were girls. Boys played “Army.” Girls played with dolls. Boys wore pants. Girls wore dresses. Life was good. I think I was 12 or so, before I heard the words “queer” and “gay” and learned that they meant “homosexual,” and was told what “homosexual” meant. I soon learned there was a whole panoply of people who had different ideas about sexuality. Boys who liked boys. Girls who liked girls. Boys who liked girls and boys, and vice-versa. Boys who liked to dress up like girls (and vice-versa). And then boys and girls who had their bodies altered to look like girls and boys, respectively. Confusing. I thought it was weird then. I’m not sure I think it’s any less weird now. Especially given that Bruce Jenner has “transitioned.”  Continue reading Transitory State

Scouting Today.

Hello, and we’d like to welcome you to this emergency meeting of the Kiowa Council of the Boy Scouts of America. As the Chairman of your Equality Compliance Committee, I’ve been charged with overseeing the transition of our organization into one that will be a model of politically-correct thought for the new millennium. As you might expect, there are a lot of changes in store for the Scouts. I’m sure you’ve heard rumors. We’ll I’m here to put all those rumors to rest. We have a crack team of experts on ethics, working ’round the clock to insure that we move to the cutting edge of correct thought. Continue reading Scouting Today.

Offensensitivity.

© Berkeley Breathed – All Rights Reserved. Bloom County, November 14, 1982.

NEWSFLASH: There is NO Constitutional right to ban something that might offend you.

I know this comes as a huge shock to Progressives, Atheists and Muslims everywhere. And I hate to be the one to break this tragic news to you (not really) but I looked it up. Nowhere in the United States Constitution, the Bill of Rights, or the other Amendments is there language that guarantees that you should be protected from any- and everything that causes you to be offended.  Continue reading Offensensitivity.

Where Does It End?

I’m on the mailing list of a site called “Change.org.” It’s a site that allows people to post petitions to lobby for changes in public policy. Some of them make sense. Some don’t. This morning, I received an impassioned plea from one Megan Perez, regarding food allergies and vending machines. Here’s a condensed version (emphasis mine): Continue reading Where Does It End?